Here’s Everything from EA’s E3 2015 Press Conference
Shalom and Happy Electronic Entertainment Expo! E3 is upon us again, aka The Best Time Of the Year (after my birthday). What better way to celebrate all the news and announcements than by rewriting almost everything you’ve already read? Nothing, exactly!
Star Wars was the… star of the EA conference this year, but EA also took the time to bestow upon us some details about the new Mass Effect, Mirrors Edge, FIFA, and other sports stuff. They also babbled on about business buzz words like PLAY and PASSION and SYNERGY.
The conference opened with a new Mass Effect teaser. Mostly just a bunch of new locations that look both beautiful and dangerous, and an ominous figure in N7 armour. Not much to go on, but we do get a release date: Summer 2016!
More details were released later, but no real new information yet. The new game will be called Mass Effect: Andromeda and as the title implies, it’ll take place in a new galaxy—Andromeda. Andromeda will be hundreds of years after the original trilogy (a moment of silence for beloved Shepard). You get to play as a male or female human, but not the mysterious N7 figure in the trailer. Which begs the question: WHO ARE THEY. ARE THEY IMPORTANT. ARE THEY EVIL. WHO WILL DO ALL THE CALIBRATIONS. No news on how many aliens you can bang yet.
The Need For Speed reboot got a customisation and general car-drivey-around trailer, as well as confirmation of the November 3 2015 release date that was leaked a week ago. Not to disappoint, the game has all the trappings of a classic N4S game: it’s always weirdly nighttime, testosterone-filled music is playing and you can cover your car completely in spoilers. Don’t quote me on that though.
It does look pretty impressive with ultra-realistic graphics. However I feel like Need for Speed is moving fast into hyper realism and further away from my dream of customising my car to look like a giant hot dog. A girl can dream.
My love, BioWare, announced a massive expansion to Star Wars: Old Republic, called Knights of the Fallen Empire. The expansion is free to subscribers and will be released in October this year. EA were light on details, but did provide us a beautiful cinematic trailer.
The Star Wars universe seems to be the perfect breeding ground for dysfunctional families. Knights of the Fallen Empire follows two twin boys who grow into fearsome warriors and struggle against their demanding father. Ultimately, the twins end up facing off against each other in a family feud. Not the game show. Unfortunately.
A Star Wars mobile game was also announced, a collectible card game called Star Wars: Galaxy of Heroes. Galaxy of Heroes will be available in IOS and Android later this year.
Star Wars: Battlefront got a gameplay trailer, and it was revealed that Luke Skywalker is a playable character. The gameplay featured the frozen world of Hoth, where Rebels were fighting the Empire. Lasers were everywhere.
ALL HAIL YARN BOY
The über cute physics-based platformer Unravel was… unravelled with a beautiful gameplay trailer, and naturally, Yarn Boy became the star of E3. LOOK AT HIM. HE’S SO CUTE. He is my son, my tiny son.
NBA LIVE 16
NBA Live 16 will be available 29 September 2015. EA also debuted a super fancy new app that allows players to scan their face into that game, allowing you to fulfil your dreams of playing fake basketball. The future is now!
PLANTS VS ZOMBIES
One of the weirdest games ever has a sequel! I know, finally.
The new FIFA game got a shiny new gameplay trailer, as well as number of changes and new features to the game. Most importantly: WOMEN’S TEAMS. Yes! I might finally actually be interested in this game. It’s nice to know that EA took the time to create the female characters from scratch, instead of repurposing male models and animations and slapping on a pair of boobs and some long hair. I am so tired of playing games as a female character and realising the developers went to no effort to actually make models that represent real female anatomy and movement (I’m looking at you, Dragon Age: Inquisition, and your “I just crapped my pants” Lady Inquisitor walk and manspreading). So four for you, FIFA! You go FIFA.
FIFA 16 comes out 22 September.
MIRROR’S EDGE: CATALYST
Coming 23 February 2016, Mirror’s Edge: Catalyst will tell us the origin story of our hero, Faith, in the City of Glass. And it looks awesome. Parkour!